Monday, February 28, 2011

Musical Mondays - Mistakes

Is there something in your life that given the opportunity you would go back and change? Would you go back and completely avoid the situation and treat it as if it did not even exist therefore making it no longer a part of your life? Or maybe you would go back and still interact with the situation only this time around you would deal with it in a different manner, hoping that the choices you make this time would have a different affect on the outcome. 

I have always thought this kind of thought is folly. Of course there are things that after the fact we all would like to possibly go back and have a do over. But then just as I told my son the other day, hind sight is always 20/20. It is easy to look back on a situation and have the exact interpretation as to how we "should have" dealt with it. We seem to forget that we usually do not have all the details in the beginning like we do in the end. We also seem to forget that there are usually always circumstances that have a way of clouding our eyes or possibly making our sight a bit rose colored. 
Still we spend a lot of time pondering on the what ifs and if onlys. I have times in my past that I will have to be honest and say that I wish they could have been a bit more happier, and less hurtful. I have experiences that I wish I would not have had to endure in order to learn the lesson that I eventually gleaned from them. Yet I know also that without so many of these "times" I would not be where I am today. I would not have so many of the blessings that I have. 

One may say blessings… what can you be talking about. Well for instance, my first marriage was not the best. Yet if I had not experienced it, I would not have my three wonderful children and all the wonderful things they have brought to me. I could even go as far to say that I would not have the blessing of my grandchildren as well. 
I guess I always try and see the positive in things. It drives some a bit crazy. I have been accused of being one of those overly sappy kind of people who don't allow those with "real" problems to just have their issues. Yet I myself have had my fair share of hard times. I made the decision a long time ago ( I think I was 7) when my alcoholic father had me cornered in the dining room. Everyone else had made their escape and I remained. As I attempted also to leave he stopped me and told me to sit. I obeyed his command. As he sat there and attempted to intimidate me with his harsh words and stare I returned his glare. Even when he threw a knife which landed next to my ankle, I continued to stare at him. I remember vividly telling myself that I would be the only one who controlled my happiness. Now although I made that statement with as much conviction as any 7 year old could I still had years to learn it fully.
Life is not always fun. In fact many times it can be down right a pain in the ass. Yet it is what you make of it. It is what you do with what you have. So do I think I have made mistakes? Hell yea I am sure I have and I am sure I still will. Am I asking for a second chance? Only to be 20 some again so I could go out and act crazy and have twice the energy that I have now. 

I have choosen one of my favorite songs for today. "Same Mistake" by James Blunt. Although it may not go along exactly with the way I feel it always makes me think on the subject. Beautiful words from a beautiful voice. 

I think Sophia Loren put it best when she said "mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life."


Wendy said...

It's easy to live in the land of regret. I know that I slip into that place of frustration and the "what if's" a lot, but then something shifts and I get to that place like you are and find something positive occurred even though it still might be a bit tender and raw inside. Coming from a place of such trauma, I think it's wonderful that you're still able to find the beauty and joy in live, Mother Moon.

mxtodis123 said...

This is a great post. Things to change. If I could go back and change something, it would be to have taken better care of my health. Everything else was a necessary part of my growth...however uncomfortable it may have seemed at the time.

By the way. Love the print here. I've been afraid to change mine.

SilverFox said...

There are many events of my life I wish I could simply erase (abusive first relationship, leading to several petty relationships and heartache to be the main ones) but without that in my past, I'd never found who I am with today and know that things can be different.
I'm a positive and optimistic person myself - drives my boyfriend batty sometimes - but we all crash at some point, and will pick ourselves up again.

Anonymous said...

I don't believe in regrets. Everything I have done, right or wrong, made me who I am today.



Linda in New Mexico said...

I love this post.....I have always thought it a waste of time to want "do overs". What is, is. What was, is the paint we use to paint the background of our self portrait. The most remarkable is that we pick what we paint. And what we look like to others. I can't say I like all that has occured in my life or the lives of the ones I hold dear, but we have some great opportunities for vivd backgrounds....

Great posting. Hey psssst. we miss you at the garden. We've all been there as of late....XOXO Linda

Jayne said...

A lifetime seems not long enough in which to find the balance of making peace with the past,while braving the tides of the present,and concurrently be looking towards the future. To be an optimist is a definite blessing to both the psyche and the soul!

Mina said...

Wonderful post. Regrets are such a waste of life. There is too much beauty to be made.

Faerie Moon Creations said...

Excellent choice for a song - I really admire James Blunt. His music is so honest and heartfelt. Sometimes I wish I could go back and change things - but every step I have taken has led me to where I am today. Sure, I have made missteps but I have learned from them and grown to be the person I am. Thanks again so much for baring your soul. Music really does have the capacity to heal. I truly believe that. Theresa