For some time now, I have felt a strong need to organize... clean.... prioritize... All those words somewhat describe my inner feelings yet none quite exact. These are usually urges that are strongest in the spring as new growth and birth come about, yet here it is the beginning of fall and I can not seem to shake them.
I will admit that for the last year my schedule has been somewhat askew to say the least. The grandkids have moved out of state. No longer do I have the joy of watching them 3 days a week. Vince's work has slowed considerably and he is home much more than before. This in itself has changed my schedule significantly. I do not have the leisure of time as I had before.
Yet despite this I have a strong feeling to gather myself and get myself in order. I know the importance of tending to oneself. I understand that one can not truly give the best they have to others if they do not first give to themselves. I feel myself yearning for silence & solitude. Just quiet moments alone. It is as if a change is near.
I welcome change, although I will admit that it often brings some discomfort. Usually nothing that is dire just discomfort in a nusiance sense. It is always so much easier to stay in our comfort zone where we know what to expect and what to do. Yet with change comes new opportunities, new adventures.... I am not quite sure what this will all bring, at least that is what I am currently telling myself. I feel it will bring more work, more discipline, tighter routines. Yet I have had a nice break.
Yes, I know I am rambling.... and yes, I know that I may have not said anything of sense, yet it is comforting to know that I can do just that and my friends will listen and when felt led they will give me their counsel and words of wisdom...
5 comments:
Phew. Well, life stages certainly do challenge us and our ideas about what is our "normal" and what is comfortable. I think the best thing to do is to be gentle with yourself. I would suggest not to worry about "more work, discipline, and tighter routines" unless that is what you honestly WANT.
Are there some activities you can get involved in that can help fill the void that your other activities filled? What about planning to travel more to see the grandkids? I'm just trying to throw a few things out there.
Above all, listen to your heart. It will lead you to your best, most comfortable and happy life.
p.s. This time of year is always one of inner reflection. As the world around us retreats within in preparation for the long winter, so we, too, go within and see what's in there.
You gave me exactly what I needed... good wholesome wisdom... thanks
I have been on the same path, Mother Moon. For me it is a time of letting go of things I no longer need or beautify my life. A good purging of what was and what I need now. I just did a quick math calculation [fingers make a great calculator] and discovered I am leaving my 8th cycle of 7 year periods in October. I believe in 7 year cycles and can hear David Bowie singing, "Changes" in my head....
Your heart is telling you what you need. Trust yourself. You didn't get this far in life without instinctively knowing what you need. Or don't need.
Nice to meet you, Mother Moon. I'll be back~
I get that feeling every autumn. For me, I start to feel that pull or need to turn inward. Less time out and about, more time hibernating - not just physically, but spiritually and intellectually.
This feels like a good time to shed the old and prepare for the new, to examine thoughts, beliefs, and ideas, and spend time in learning and growing, internally.
Hopefully all these changes you feel are good ones.
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