As I browse over the posts this morning, it appears that many have spoken of love. I imagine this is because Valentine’s Day is tomorrow. This holiday has always confused me somewhat. When I was a child I have to admit that I adored taking an empty shoe box and decorating it for school. Mainly because I just like to do such things... It was inevitable that mine would be covered in shiny silver foil paper with red construction paper hearts covering it. I was not as fortunate as others to have the dainty paper doilies that I loved so much. As I think back on this time I remember how much the size and quantity of valentines one received meant. Silly really yet in grade school such emphasis is placed on such ridiculous things. This can especially be seen after you grow older and look back.
Is it really any different now that I am an adult? I have always told the men in my life to not worry about Valentine’s Day. I would much rather be surprised on a random day of the year. And the surprise does not have to be an expensive card, a box of chocolates or flowers… Although let me say I love chocolates and flowers … And don’t even get me started on attempting to go out and have a nice dinner on Valentine’s Day. The day when 5o million other people are trying to do the same thing… It is a hopeless cause. Vincent and I started a tradition the year we got together where we stayed at home and had all our favorite food. We spread a blanket out on the floor with a bottle of wine and enjoy ourselves.
My other complaint about the day is that I feel it is unfair to men. All the trinkets or at least most of them are geared towards women. The emphasis of commercials, advertisements etc is always directed to the female in the relationship. What about the other half? Don’t they deserve a nice Valentine? Of course there is always sex and I guess with statistics saying that the average male thinks about sex ever 4 seconds that is a good bet on a good gift. Yet isn’t a true relationship a bit more than sex? Isn’t sex a result of love? Let me rephrase that… isn’t it suppose to be… Think I am getting a bit off the subject now.
I think I have to agree with a friend of mine that told me once that Valentine’s Day is a conspiracy created by a woman to force men to spend lots of money and give them things they want… I say take any and every moment you can to let the one who is special in your life know just that… Listen to them and learn the things that really make them feel good and make them smile. Don’t feel as if you need to spend a butt load of funds to do it either. Many times it is the small things that makes us the most happy.
11 comments:
Spoken like a true romantic. You and Vincent have a great weekend. X.
~i too agree...why such a day came to be...why celebrate the beauty and magic of love on just one certain day...aren't we suppose to embrace love and give love each and everyday??? we for the last 12 years have stayed home too...quiet and intimate...we cook together indulge in sweets and just savor the day as a family...why go out and share such with millions of other people...waiting in long lines...uugghh...no gifts as we feel our love should be enough...your cupid shot down is a riot...thank you for sharing your thoughts...brightest blessings~
I just mentioned yesterday how unfair it is to men. I have NEVER gotten flowers. No box of chocolate. No jewelry. No neat little gadget with lights that beeps and requires 2 AA batteries (hey, I'm a guy!). I made the observation that we buy the gifts, and the only gift we're to expect in return is that "gratitude lay" afterwards. Oh you got me flowers, I'll give you sex. It kind of cheapens the whole deal.
I don't expect anything on Valentine's Day, and yet I LOVE to give on V-Day. I love to give EVERY day. And I do. I don't think there's any question of that. But yeah, it's just one of those holidays where it's so ingrained now you just can't get over feeling like you HAVE to do something.
For everytime I've heard, "You don't have to get me anything for Valentine's Day", I've also heard behind the words, "But I'd be disappointed if you don't". It's built in to the whole thing.
It's a holiday founded on guilt, obligation, and expectations, which I think.... is what society's view of LOVE today is.
You are so right! Very well written! I would much rather spend the evening at home with George than in some restaurant with hundreds of other people. I like to place notes in his shirt, pants and jacket pockets. He loves to reach in a pocket and find a note or a handful of candy. He loves chocolate as much as I do. With him traveling, I like to put pictures in his bag too.
(((HUGS)))
What you say is so true,"Many times it is the small things that makes us the most happy". Most women want to just be thought of, it's not about the fancy gift. Although Valentine's day is a commercial holiday, my boyfriend and I exchange gifts every year. I enjoy another excuse to dote on him and wrap up a gift in heart covered packaging. Everyday really should be about showing love to your Valentine, in the end, having someone to share love with is such a blessing.
I gave up eating the candy a long time ago. Now, when hubby gives me the heart, it becomes a treat for those who don't have anyone. I always take it to work with me and share. But, I still love the romantic thoughts of the day.
Mary
I hope you and Vincent have a loving, romantic, sexy weekend. :)
Lucky for my Hubby I never expect anything on this day from him except his time and that he always gives me.
Thank you for the comment on my blog about my basket.
Willow
I really like the idea of staying at home with wine and a blanket on the floor. I think things like that which are much more focused on your actual relationship really beat the crap out of fighting the crowds because you're right, there really are 50 million other people waiting for a table at that restaurant too. lol Good for you guys. I hope you have had a wonderful and romantic weekend together!
I completely agree with you. My hubby mentioned this morning as he headed off for a 16 hour day in the restaurant that one day he would be with me/ get me something fab for Vday. I told him if I didn't know he loved me by now then that was sad. Every day is Vday with him, I don't need (or want) candy or flowers just because he feels pressured into it.
The imaginary flowers he gave me one day because he loved me and we could not afford real ones? THOSE will mean more to me than any Vday gift ever.
I also agree with you. Valentines is a made up commercial and consumerist holiday, to get you to feel guilty about not expressing your love any other time of the year the way that you should be. We do not celebrate at all, although since our 6 year old does not really understand that, we do give her a couple of little treats, but for ourselves, nothing. And your right, when you watch the advertising, it really is geared towards women, and not men. It is just another part of our society that we are expected to conform to.
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