Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Wordy Wednesday - Things on My Mind

Last weekend my son in law left for his third tour of duty. The last two years he has gone to Iraq, yet this year he will be heading to Afghanistan. I can not tell you how proud I am of this young man. He has been a wonderful husband to my daughter. He welcomed my grand kids into his life like they were his own and last February he adopted them and became their daddy also by name. In April my third grandchild was born and he proved once again just what a wonderful husband and daddy he was. Now he serving his country once again. I ask that you all keep him as well as his family in your thoughts and prayers .

In other news… Yesterday several vigils all over the world were held simultaneously in regards to kids who have to deal with bullies. I do not know if you have had this issue in your area, yet only a few months back, here in Oklahoma, an 11 year old boy committed suicide due to bullies. What could pressure an 11 year old boy to do such a thing? And then you come to the punishment of the bullies who caused the eventual incident. I have always had a bit of an issue with simply locking up young kids when they go astray. Mind you I am all for punishment for ones actions yet also I think that at an young age sometimes such experience has the chance of simply ingraining the behavior further into them.

I remember when my kids went to school and they had the “safe word” at school. I remember overhearing the principal tell a child, “if he bothers you all you have to do is say the safe word and he has to stop.” I wanted to laugh in that woman’s face. Mainly because just earlier in the parking lot, the boy she was talking about was acting out and she kept shouting the “safe word” at him and expected him to stop and come inside. Of course he did no such thing. I had to laugh.

As aged as it sounds, when I was in school if anyone done such a thing, they would get their butt paddled but good. Yea I know that spanking is no longer allowed in schools but I do not remember having any of the issues that we see in today’s schools back then. My heart goes out to those who have to endure the verbal and physical abuse from those who simply get their jollies from hurting someone, knowing that while they are at school they will not have to answer for their crimes.

My last words for today are about animal cruelty. A couple days ago a woman found 2 young puppies in a dumpster outside her place of work. They had been tossed there by an older woman and man and left to die. They lay in the sweltering heat we had (104 with a heat index of 110) until the woman found them. One of them was able to be nursed back to health yet the other was too far gone. They were riddled with worms and fleas on top of the fact that they were being literally cooked in the heat. Why I wonder do people have animals if they do not intend on taking care of them. Although I hate the number of animals that are put to sleep in shelters it is a much more humane death then what was being done to these puppies.

Another story I was told a couple days ago was from a woman who rescues horses who have been mistreated. She has recently adopted a horse that is not that pretty to look at yet it is not her fault. It was not fed properly and grew malnourished to the point that it could no longer stand. When it was too weak to stand, a cross was carved into its forehead and it was tied to the back of a tractor and drug causing cuts and bruising all over its body. Miraculously this horse survived and this woman took it into her care. She named it promise because she told me that as she nursed it all she could say to it was I promise you will always be safe here. I promise this will never happen to you again. I promise … I promise.

Why is it that people feel the need to be “tough” to things that are so much smaller than them? Whether it is bullies who pick on other kids or others who choose to abuse animals. Is it the powers they feel when they complete such acts, or do they even really think about it.

Although I know that there are laws against such behavior I wonder if the punishment really does fit the crime. It is lessened because it is an animal and not a human. Should it be? In my opinion no. Such action towards any living being, animal or human is wrong.

I chose to use photos of my own animals for this post as when I went to obtain actual photos of abused animals, the photos were so intense I could barely look at them myself.  Their content was far to graphic.  Although I knew that their reality would easily get my point across the pain that they caused me as I looked at the few I did see, was something that I did not wish to share.

In closing I would like to leave you with this thought. “Who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of others to set the frontiers of our destiny. Our destiny cannot be changed but it can be challenged. Every man is born as many men, yet he dies as a single one.”

15 comments:

Jen said...

Wonderful post. So much to think about.

My son was bullied awful and I was at the principal's office all the time. The parents of the bully never wanted to attend a meeting to put an end to the torture my son went through. He's 20 now and still has issues due to this among other things. I had no problem pressing charges against the child who beat up my son because he didn't like my son's hair. Can you believe that?!!

Anyway, thank you again for posting a lot of food for thought!~

Debra She Who Seeks said...

May the Shield of Athena's protection guard your son-in-law while he is in harm's way.

Judy said...

Animal abuse just infuriates me...why does anyone feel they can do this...and the punishment does not fit the crime...that animal's life is just an important to it as any person's is to them...(except for mosquitoes of course)...oh mannn, I'm going to cry...

My son when he was pre-teen, was suicidal because of bullies...we spent alot of time working with him to keep him going...this was in the 1980's...I believe it's more of a problem now than it was then...it's so sad...and I feel for the bully also, because most likely they learned it from experiencing it...

Sending your family 'safe' thoughts...

Dirgesinger said...

I also have a very close friend on duty... and I wish I was able to keep them safe!
I am a goth and whilw in other corners of the world goth youngsa suffer bullying at school, they are here in Hungary just... laughed at? I never experienced physical bullying while at school (and that was 11 years ago) but from the people of the streets I got and still get a lot of hateful remarks, being to them a laughing stock just for being other. It hurts almost as much as if beaten. But I guess if I would get beaten I would be made the guilty party - "You caused it to Yourself be cause You look like an immoral Satanic b*tch", they usually think and say.
I cannot say anything of cruelty to animals...it grieves me too much to see and read it every day. I am a very, very calm person but I would knopw what to do with these monsters who raise hands on animals...

AkasaWolfSong said...

Holding You and Yours in my thoughts and prayers Janie...
I will light a candle for your son-in-law today.

Lots of poignant thoughts to ponder on this morning...

Love and Blessings!
xoxoxo

Anonymous said...

I will keep your son-in-law in my prayers. But also thank him for the sacrifices he is making to protect our country. Also, thank your daughter for the sacrifices that she is making to allow him to do this for us.

Your post brought me to tears because I have never understood how people can be so cruel. Volunteering at a humane society many years ago was one of the most rewarding but heart breaking things I have ever done. I held a great pyranese's head in my lap while she took her last breath after her owner dropped her off because "she was a piece of shit worthless dog".

mxtodis123 said...

Kids can be so cruel. I was doing well in school until my cousin moved into the area and was in my class. He used to make fun of me terribly and eventually managed to get almost the whole class to chime in. It was dreadful. Makes for some very unhappy school years.
Mary

OmaLindasOldeBaggsandStuftShirts said...

First day back at school, 1st grade, first recess, the boy who tried to gouge out my grands eyes, scratched, bit, hit, pinched, kicked and kneed him in the groin last year in kindergarten, kicked him in the groin. We filed a police report, a school police report and yesterday, a week after the incident, my daughter went to talk to the staff at his school. No earlier appointment because they had to investigate.
It's Ry's fault because he approached the boys and made a noise that the "bully" didn't like and so they will not keep the boys apart. What? Last year we played nice and waited for intervention. This year...not one more day will we wait for justice. Harsh, maybe, justified, I'd say.
Now with his eye surgery, it is a scary thought to send him back to....la di flippin da ville.
I will most certainly put your SIL's name in the protection meditation. You have good reason to be so very proud of him.
The Olde Bagg

Wendy said...

War and cruelty, two of the biggest "sins" on earth we can inflict on other people and animals. Sending prayers for your son in law, may children find strength and the resources to protect themselves and may BAD karma happen to those who hurt our beloved fur friends. Thank you for reminding me Mother Moon with words the power we have to help others with happiness or cruelty.

Merry ME said...

I pray for the day when moms and dads, sisters and brothers, husbands and wives no longer have to leave home to go to war. I am grateful for your guards service as he protects my/our way of life. May Peace one day reign on this earth.

May that same peace put an end to bullying everywhere - human and animal alike.

Shaking my head in sadness at the stories you tell.

Leigh said...

Excellent post. It seems that the world is just getting farther and farther off track. You and your daughter have every right to be so proud of you SIL. He sounds like a wonderful guy.

Bogaman said...

Your son in law will be in my prayers. I personally think what our government is doing is criminal. Sending these young people back again and again. They should reinstate the draft so the burden isn't placed on so few. X.

Unknown said...

Your whole family will be in my prayers and I will light a candle of protection for him as well. Our servicemen, women and their families are blessings to each and every one of us and I respect that dearly.

Bully's are bully's for a reason I think. Because they can! My son was bullied when we first moved to this town and still today people try to push his buttons, because he does have a very short fuse. We have went through so much it would take a whole blog to describe some of the situations. I really wish that the paddle had not been taken out of the school. Teachers hands are tied when it comes to punishing. Parent's today I have found are weak- to find a parent that actually punishes their child for their offenses is few and far between and I live in a small community. It's a shame of what is coming up in the future when these children today that have not been taught respect or morals turn into parents.

We can only do what we can do, and we do it even if our children hate us sometimes. I'm not here to be their friend.

I have watched videos of children torturing animals. Animal cruelty is yes, just as offensive as human. Why some don't believe that is beyond me. I believe your right in that putting them away for their crimes at a young age is not the answer. But then sometimes, and this is going to sound crazy...I don't think some people have a conscience or have the ability to feel guilt or remorse. I know that is horrible to say, but I really believe its true. Bless you and Sorry for my long winded comment Janie.

Amy said...

Each of these thoughts are so so very important. Your son in law and his family will be in my thoughts. Blessings to you all. xx

Unknown said...

I am keeping your son in law, family and you in my prayers. My husband is also in the service and I am blessed to have him home for a little while longer. Next year he will have a nine month tour. It is hard but you and your daughter can do it.